To my brother Ted

Heidi Collings (Vellenga)
Vineland, ON
Sister to Ted

Thank you to all of you who have shared your memories of Ted. Ben, thank you for facilitating this blog. What has been written has been a blessing and will continue to be in the days, months and years to come.

There are three of us (children) in our family - Tim, Ted and myself. Although Ted was two years younger, I always thought of him more as my “older” brother. Ted had a gift of listening and then graciously imparting wisdom. We as his family would always enjoy living vicariously through his adventures and yet he also did the same through us.

Ted served the Lord in his life here on earth. He did so, humbly and yet it spoke volumes. Ted’s work on earth is done and God has taken him to his eternal home. God did not do this to us - he has done it for us. I believe how we respond to what has happened is how we may be blessed.

I miss my brother Ted – his smile, his eyes, his red beard, the way he loved our children, the brother he was to Tim and I, his love for farming, his love for those who struggled, how he purposely chose our children’s Christmas presents, and his desire to pray in all circumstances. Yet, I will always remember him and long to see him again in glory.

In closing as we approach 2008 some words I believe Ted lived by…may we too.

This life, therefore,
is not righteousness but growth in righteousness,
not health but healing,
not being but becoming,
not rest but exercise.
We are not yet what we shall be, but we are growing toward it;
The process is not yet finished but it is going on.
This is not the end but it is the road;
All does not yet gleam in glory but all is being purified.

Martin Luther

Karren Collings

Karren Collings
Fenwick, ON
Extended Family

I am Ted's sister Heidi's mother-in-law; her husband Christopher is my son.

I only was in Ted's company a few times, but when I saw him & talked with him, he always had a smile on his face, as the pictures in these blogs emulate so well.

The last time I saw Ted was here at my home a couple of summers ago, when he was holding & frolicking in my backyard pool with his two young nephews, Theo & Evan (Heidi & Christopher's sons). He was having such fun with them & they with him. He adored his nephews & nieces, and that feeling was mutual, as Theo often mentioned his Uncle Ted. One of the boys' presents from Ted was a little wooden boat that they play with in the bathtub at bathtime - the boat is propelled by air escaping from a blown-up balloon (which I quickly learned to blow up to a decent size) attached to the back of it..The boys would watch with joy as the little boat would move on the water with the burst of air...And they told me that the boat was from Uncle Ted...I must get more balloons for that little boat...I also talked with Ted when we were standing outside the church after a service (I don't remember which one...perhaps Evan's baptism)..We were watching Theo playing in the dirt & climbing on some objects back there in his dress beige pants (we laughed about that)...Ted was smiling the whole time he was chatting with me as he watched his nephew playing. He had such a great love for his family, & it showed on his face & in his conversation.

Christopher & Heidi sent me the blog website, & I learned more about Ted from reading these blogs this morning. Here are some of my thoughts from reading them...

It is important for us to try to continue Ted's mandate: To follow Ted's example & beliefs to work with God's earth & His people to create & sustain a healthy, better life for ourselves & others with developmental or emotional impairments; to be sensitive to others; to listen without judgement; to encourage others by using kind words, & showing love & respect to them to help restore their dignity & strength.

Practically speaking, we can continue Ted's respect for God's earth & try to minimize our impact on this earth by following Ted's example of energy conservation (eg. turning off lights, using energy efficient bulbs), recycling paper, etc., driving our cars less...you get my drift.

In a nutshell, I think that Ted would want us to be kind & gentle to all of God's creation, both human & fourlegged, & the earth; & most important: to preserve the earth & use it to help heal & strengthen others, as was Ted's dream to fulfill.

May God Bless all of you as you continue your lives in your chosen fields to do His work...Amen.

Friend from CPE

Pat Weatherwax
Kalamazoo, MI
Colleague from Pine Rest Mental Health Hospital


I met Ted when we were both in our first unit of CPE at Pine Rest Christian Mental Health Hospital, in the summer of 2004. We were assigned to the same unit, which was one of the most acute areas of the hospital. (I called it "double-locked and segregated.") I had just graduated from Western Seminary and I believe Ted had just finished his first year at Calvin. We spent the summer learning how to be chaplains in some very difficult surroundings. Ted was always so gentle, respectful and low key with the patients, even when they were not rational or respectful towards him.

I remember, and maybe always will remember when it was his first turn to lead the worship services- preaching for the 3 acute units. We'd do the same service at 9, 10, and 11 AM, in pairs without any chaplain supervisors. Ted asked very seriously how he should prepare. I said "Oh, just pull one out of your file, that's what I did". Ted's answer, at that point, early in his career was "Well, I don't really have a file, I've never done this before". So maybe I heard him preach for the first time, I don't know. I do know he brought in a budding branch and used Jesus' "I am the vine" message, to show how we are connected to God. It was peaceful and clear.

Sometimes I'd drive Ted to the nearest bus stop; he'd never let me drive him all the way home because it was out of my way. But he'd know those bus schedules!

I grieve the world's loss of this gifted young chaplain, and pray for his family and friends.

Pat Weatherwax

Remembering Ted

Jim Alblas
Seminary Friend

I just found out yesterday about the loss of my friend, Ted Vellenga, a greatly saddening thing to hear. I knew Ted during our days together at Calvin Seminary and it was primarily in the school’s Computer Lab that our friendship developed. Some people just bring a smile to us when they enter the room and Ted was one of those people. While toiling over writing papers I conversed with Ted and learned a lot about Him. He was passionate about the environment and being a good steward of God’s creation. He found other students discarded print offs and would manually feed them into the printer using the clean side to print his homework on. He convinced me to use more energy efficient light bulbs in my part time position as a maintenance worker at the school. Late at night I would even see Ted wandering the halls turning of lights in unused rooms. Ted had a heart for fighting against injustice in the world. I remember one December in the computer lab I was pondering what Christmas Gifts to buy and Ted introduced me to the world of fair trade and advised me on some of the downsides to shopping at certain larger stores. Most importantly I learned that Ted was a dedicated Christian man who loved the Lord strongly and served Him well. He was a great listener and encourager, often taking the time to listen to my concerns that I would share with him and never making me feel guilty that my sharing was delaying his paper writing. He was an excellent worship leader and great communicator of God’s word; I appreciated witnessing the few school chapel services that he led and marveled that this soft spoken fellow embodied such confidence and authority from the pulpit.

I remember often voicing my respect for Ted and sharing how I hoped I could be more like him, but he would never allow me to put him on a pedestal and instead always reminded me of my own good qualities. One time he even told me that he thought I would be a good minister, to which I will always be thankful for his compliment.

When Ted told me that he was going on a one-year internship to do ministry in a hospital, I was saddened knowing that I would not be able to enjoy his presence in the computer lab for my final year. But I knew that Ted would be a blessing to all those he would come in contact with, just as he was a blessing to me.

While I will miss Ted, my comfort is in knowing that he is with the Lord and that one day, I will see my friend again.

Meg Jenista

Meg Jenista
Grand Rapids, MI
Friend from Seminary

I was at home with my family in Ohio when I recieved the news about Ted. I went through many of the predictable grieving stages, trying to make sense of a senseless death. I thought to myself: "I can't believe my neice (who was playing nearby at the time) is going to grow up in a world without Ted Vellenga." The world, those of us who knew him and even those who will never meet him, is impoverished by Ted's death because it was made so much richer by Ted's life. Ted's was a quiet and gentle presence, the kind of presence that, in it conviction and passion, is a true force to be reckoned with. That's what I keep thinking.

I met Ted the first quarter of seminary through a Crown Bible Study group. I'm a person who likes to talk first and think later. Ted was the exact opposite and I was sure he thought I was ridiculous and silly for my outspoken ways, so contrary to his own. But then I got to know him and realized that no one in Ted's world needed to fear judgment. He heard people well and without judgment. Anyone who's taken a Ron Nydam pastoral care class knows the wonderful difficulty and grace of that particular discipline. He listened, not only to words, but to hearts that had yet to find words. I remember that I liked to hear him pray.

We talked some about what we were going to be when we grew up. I don't suppose I ever knew what Ted thought about the theology of women in ministry but I never once doubted that I was welcome as a person and a collegue in his life. That kind of hospitality is valuable and, all the more so, for its rarity.

I remember the evening Ted showed me his gardens. I couldn't believe that a run-of-the-mill backyard in Grand Rapids could be transformed into a showcase of organic farming in the miniature. Ted's eyes betrayed such happiness over the competent work of his own hands. Ted loved to get his hands dirty in the soil of the earth and the depth of human souls. He told me about a dream, maybe he shared with others too, of wanting to combine these passions and someday create a place, a farm where people with developmental or emotional impairments could find their own pride, dignity and strength by working the land.

At Ted's funeral, we read Romans 8:20-25, which reads, in part: "For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God."

As a farming man, Ted probably understood that verse better than many of us. He worked against the curse by living close to the creation, as a gardener AND a pastor/chaplain. He worked to liberate all creation from bondage to decay and to bring it into the glorious freedom of Christ's Kingdom. Since I heard of Ted's death, I've been thinking about Christ's Kingdom, perhaps more than a 29-year-old usually does. I know Ted is with God now and I'm looking forward to the day when I can, again, tour his showcase of organic farming, only this time, in the eternal.

"For in this hope, we were saved. . .But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently."

Candidacy Picture

To My Friend Ted

Benjamin Spalink; New York, NY; friend from seminary

I just received news yesterday that my friend from seminary died. We went through seminary together all four years, were scripture reading accountability partners, and were in the same small group at seminary for ministry preparation. I knew Ted pretty well and had a profound respect for him. Ted was one of those people whose life was entirely consistent with his faith. Ted believed that we ought to be more considerate towards the earth and try to minimize our impact on the earth. Everyday, Ted took class notes on recycled envelopes from the junk mail he received. He tapped local maple trees to drink the sweet water that came from them. He planted a massive farm in his friend's backyard, growing an amazing variety of herbs, vegetables and fruits. Ted learned how to shear sheep, butcher cattle, and make his own iron tools with a few blacksmithing lessons. Ted avoided driving as much as possible and only bought an old pickup when it was absolutely necessary. He carted most of his stuff around on an old bike with baskets.

What was even more amazing about Ted was his ability to listen. He was probably the most empathic person I'd ever met. He could listen and understand a person's feelings with little or no subjective judgmentalism. Even my wife appreciated him and loved him for his kindness and gentle manner.